Alicia’s Indian Wedding (The first one)

In the morning, when I woke up, I was so groggy.  I hardly slept at all. I did not want my hair to get knotted up. We had to be at the temple at 7am. Andrew took me to the temple, and stayed wit with me, while we all got ready. Regis and Heather were the first to show up at the Temple.

We all got ready where the ceremony was going to be. While the girls were getting a dressed, all the men had to leave the room. As Alicia was getting ready, people were trying to come up the elevator to get into the room, so they could take their seats for the ceremony. Alicia told me to tell everyone that they had to stay downstairs, because the ceremony didn’t start yet. I am not a wedding planner, so i went to the elevator and told the guests they needed to stay downstairs, until it was time to come up. Some of the guests were upset with me, but I didn’t care. This is not my job. It was the most chaotic thing I have ever been a part of ever. There was no organization. People were everywhere. They had no clue how this works, there were no signs there, the wedding planner had to leave to go to a different wedding, and didn’t stay for the entire time, so she couldn’t tell everyone the plan, if there is one.

Supposedly, the ceremony was to  start outside, and everyone follows the horse, and that the groom rides in a horse. Well her guests did not know that, and there was no one there to communicate these details to them. I was losing my patience with Alicia, and everyone there. I couldn’t wait to get these two days over with.

Once the ceremony started, we were all outside, on the temple stairs dancing to the music, as the horse approached the temple stairs, Sambit was on the horse. The moment brought tears to his eyes, and I felt happy for them, but at the same time pissed off at Alicia. I was over her bullshit, and her stuck up holier than now attitude. She kept telling me to be nicer, and to calm down. She put me in an awkward position, and if she did not like something, or wanted something done, and you ask someone else to do it, because you don’t have a back bone to take care of it yourself, then don’t complain how someone handles it. She should have had this shit under control. It was no wonder why everyone is flustered and I was not the only one.  I put a smile on for the photographer. I really wanted to just leave.

After a few pictures with the horse, it was time to go inside and start the ceremony. We were about to walk down the aisle, but did not know where to sit. Alicia never told us where to go after we go down the aisle. When we asked her, she wanted us to stand to the side. So I asked one of the groomsmen if we could all just stand, like she asked me to do. Once again, she wanted me to handle it. I asked the groomsmen, if he minds standing, the bride wants us to stand on either side, and the Indian groomsmen said, “Well it is tradition to sit, so whatever tradition is.” I said, “I understand tradition, but it is what the bride wants.” He said, “Ok, but it is tradition to sit, so we are going to sit.” I said, “Fine.” I walked away and went back to tell the bridesmaids to sit in the first row of seats. There was one Indian man standing in the middle of the aisle, as I was walking down aisle. John the photographer told the man to sit down and get out of the way. I tried not to laugh. He did get my picture. What a mess!

After we sat down, the ceremony started, there was chanting, smoke, fire, fruit, and we were able to throw rice at them. The ceremony was very involved, and relaxed. It was a watered down Indian Wedding. Alicia and Sambit walked around the fire seven times and repeated their vows. It was interesting.  When the ceremony was over, we took pictures, and then ate a lite lunch, so lite that they ran out of food and plates for the guests. I laughed on the inside, and I was just so over all of this.

the-bridal-party-5 me-and-my-husband

Andrew and I made the first exit out of there that we could. The plan was to meet at the United Methodist Church in the Northside at 4pm for the rehearsal for the next wedding that is to take place tomorrow. I went with Andrew to the chiropractor, changed out of my Indian sari and into the dress for the rehearsal dinner. I was so ready for this to end.

Once we left Dr. Bailey’s, we went to Starbucks to kill some time, then to the Northside. We made it there at 4pm, and there was no one there. This is the time we were supposed to all meet at the church. I was beginning to notice a pattern.

We walked into the church, and met with the wedding coordinator, and then I got a Facebook message from Alicia saying, that they will be there at 5 or 5:30pm, that they got held up taking pictures, and said you know how it goes. I said, “No I don’t, because I was organized and planned, and things were on time because I had commitments to be somewhere, and it affects everyone else.” I hung up on her, and waited for her to get there.

When people arrived, I told them that she won’t be here until about 5:30pm, or 6pm. She sent me a Facebook message. The flower girl and ring bearer’s mom was frustrated with her as well. She said, “No one is checking Facebook today, so how would we know?” I said, “Well that is how we, the bridesmaids have been communicating with each other, so that is how I know.” I am sorry lady, what more did she want from me. The bride was a flake, not my problem. She took her kids to the humane society to kill sometime, and then came back for the rehearsal.


When Alicia finally got there, I could ring her neck. She gathered us all to the front of the church, and the reverend kicked off the rehearsal. He placed us into formation at the altar for Alicia to see how we looked up there, and if she liked it or not, and the Princess liked it. She and I desperately needed to talk, but I do not know if we were going to get the chance or not. I wanted to tell her how pissed off I was at her, and I am sure she was going to have a few things to say to me.

When we were at the altar, the plan was for us to have both candles and our bouquets. I said, “How is that going to work?” she said, “You could ask nicely instead of judging it and turning your face up at the idea.” I said, “Well I am not I just think it needs to be addressed, and I am saying the same thing everyone else is thinking.” The pastor probably could sense the tension, and said, “Well you and the best man probably won’t have to light a candle anyway, because we are down a bridesmaid, but she will be here tomorrow.” Alicia wanted us all to have candles. so the pastor said I could set our bouquets down on the table next to me, when the candle portion is over, I can pick up the flowers again. This was so fucking stupid, really. Nothing is ever simple. The church was hot as hell too.

After running through the ceremony a few times, we were able to leave and meet everyone at Peter’s place in Bridgeville for the rehearsal dinner. Finally it was time for a beer, and food. Andrew and I were so tired, and so over the day. When we got to Peter’s, Alicia and Sambit were the last to arrive of course, and she said at the wedding that there will be no beer bottles she said, its tacky. Drew and I just looked at each other and drank our beer, which were in bottles already. She said, “Yes you two.” Nothing like being singled out and being mortified. Who was this woman?  She gave us all necklaces for being in the wedding and wanted us to wear them. She forgot two necklaces. Alicia made a little speech, before she gave out the gifts. I just smiled and tried not to laugh at how silly this all was. I was so over this all. I wish I had the guts to tell her off and leave.


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